Letting Go
I’ve let go of the man I love a thousand times. Most times it’s more than clear that he doesn’t love me the way I love him. Most times it’s more than clear that I’m in love with the fantasy of him, yet sometimes my heart reads between every line – seeing his love for me where it’s not. I’ve learned that it takes years for heartstrings to break. That even when you’ve got closure and you know why it will never work out, the heart wants what it wants.
You just learn to build walls around yourself. To act like you no longer care for that person when in reality, he lives rent free in your heart. To act like you forgot all the little things that make him happy when in reality, you know them. Once in awhile it feels like you have let go 100%, that your heart has accepted that love can never be forced, then out of nowhere, without you even planning to think about him, his name comes to your mind with fond memories attached.
Heart of mine, can’t you see that you’ve thought of him longer than you actually shared something sweet with him? Move on…
Dreams come true
With every step I take towards those dreams that will not allow me sleep, I am closer to realizing them than I was yesterday. I have seen and touched some of them. As a teenager, I dreamt of becoming an editor, now I am one. With every blog I publish, I actualize that dream. I dreamt of being a nutritionist, Mr. Google Sir is tutoring me. You will find me asking him about the health benefits of this and that herb or spice. You will get find me asking him for foods that cure certain diseases. I would rather endure bitter foods than follow the doctors’ prescriptions.
Recently, I fell in love with tea spiced with fresh orange and soursop leaves, and I’m trying to limit my sugar intake. Did you know that soursop leaves are anti cancerous? Well, of late I fuss over healthy living because a majority of our mothers, mine and my friends’, are struggling with their health now. Trying to exercise in their late 50s, trying to reverse pressure and diabetes with healthy food remedies. So I figured, why not start now considering I live a sedentary lifestyle? I started jogging in Feb and I do that most mornings.
I can almost touch my dream of becoming a published author. This year, by my 30th birthday, my first book will be out. It’s my ‘welcome to the third floor gift’ to myself.
Financial Capital
When I started to save my money, I started seeing opportunities around me. I began to dream about my dreams coming true. I have seen one by one making a bundle. Although all my different businesses ventures have been slow in this first half of the year, I dare to believe that wherever I’ve scattered seed, it will sprout into a bountiful harvest. So, I press on by sharpening my sword. I press on by doing whatever I can. I press on by living within my means because I know, that overflow is coming soon.
Spiritual Capital
This year I told myself that I will not skip going to church every Sunday. I told myself, I will serve God with everything I have within me. I started well in January. By March, I began to struggle. Guys, showing up and serving have been hardest for me this year. I need divine intervention. I’m on and off with my challenge of reading a Chapter of Proverbs a day to become wise. So, I fall down and pick myself up.
What has kept me going is my team of prayer partners who look for me when I disappear. Plus it’s encouraging to know that they are praying for me even when I don’t show up.
Chapter 30 Podcast
Life is still capable of amazing us with new ideas. I was busy minding my own business. Praying with two of my friends every morning, for God to guide me as I turn 30 this year. From praying for myself, we began to pray for all our friends who were turning 30 this year. Now we’re praying for everyone in their 30s. So, I started getting excited about turning 30 and made noise on my WhatsApp status at every opportunity I got of how I was grateful to God that I was turning 30.
The more I celebrated, the more some of my friends inboxed me about how they were afraid of turning 30. I tried having one on one sessions with some of them but we failed to creat the time. Our schedules were clashing. Then one night…(Repeat after me, “One night.”) an idea popped into my mind about starting a podcast for 30 year olds to talk about everything that affects us starting with accepting our age.
After thinking and praying about it, I started Chapter 30 Podcast on May 10, 2024. Since then, I put out a new podcast every Friday (I’ve skipped 2 Fridays because I’m enjoying WinteABC; been throwing back old podcasts, LOL). I have this dream of hosting people older than us to pour out what they have learned into us and of course guests in their 30s who are the target group for my podcast will be hosted. I officially take this opportunity to invite all of you as guests on my podcast. Let me know if you’re interested.
To be honest, a lot of people in their 30s are struggling because they are not where they thought they would be, they feel left behind. Chapter 30 is here to creat a safe hangout for the latest adults on the block as we navigate our 30s. It’s not as bad as our minds make it look like. We can do this.
Community Matters
We’re better together. My church family has sharpened me. My small circles of threes each play a different role in my life. Word For Today Publications Limited has got my back plus Afrobloggers continually reaffirms me that storytelling matters, that I’m not alone in my pursuit of words. And family is my default fall back place. They may not understand me and my passions and dreams but they’ve got my back.
I’m Excited About Turning 30
I’m very excited. Guys, I am over the moon. Jesus began His public ministry at 30. Joseph was brought before Pharoah and made the Prime Minister of Egypt at 30. David was crowned king at 30. The Levites began to serve in the house of God at 30. What will Winnie begin to do at 30 because guys, I’m excited to see where this journey is taking me. 10/10 just come already.
I plan on having 30 days of celebration, of thanksgiving, of storytelling, of generosity as I walk down to 10/10.
Fruitful Vine 
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